Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends

The past week or so I realized (or re-realized) a few things:

1. I do have great friends.
I need to let the ones who are stepping up, be great and be the type of friend I am.
I need to make sure, even though I'm having a rough time, I'm still the same friend I've always been.
I need to give some, more credit for who they are and what they do.
I need to cut others some slack.
I need to let them be my "secret keepers" (Harry Potter shout out)
I need to stop being such an idiot in certain situations.

2. I walk a fine line.
Between what I/we need and want, and what most people would say is dumb and asking for trouble.
I will maintain my balancing act, and for now I think I can maintain it indefinitely.
Between keeping everything in my life in balance (huh--this is where I've been struggling)

3. Time will never slow down.
Even though right now I'm mostly thinking from sunup through sundown, I am speeding to the future.
I need to start making more things count. (I'm not going to say "live each day to the fullest" or "live each day is my last" because I think that's crap. If I did, I wouldn't be here, sitting in classes that bore me nearly to tears and that stress me out to tears. I would be maxing out credit card after credit card, going skydiving and bungee jumping. I would go to concerts. I would fly to London and watch the Olympics first hand. I would climb Mt. Rainier [which would probably kill me so I wouldn't have to deal with my credit card debt]. I would do whatever I wanted with whomever I wanted). I'm merely saying that when I think about it, I need to make things count more.

4. I have to grow up.
I'm not talking maturity-wise. I had to grow up fast and I've always been very mature and an independent person.
I will never be 4 years old again–where everyone you met was your new best friend, and your only hardship was not getting a cookie before dinner. I will never be 10 again–where you went to your best friend's house every night until dinner playing make believe, and the hardest thing in life was long division. I will never be 14 again–where you thought you knew what love was, and you thought your midnight curfew was to strict. And it's kind of time to accept that, that this is life and it's always going to be changing.
I hate the change, and I will always hate it; but I'm going to have to start actively making myself ok with it.

5. I have to let things go.
I probably should limit the time and energy I spend dwelling on the past. Now, you can't just "forgive and forget" and all that jazz. No one ever forgets. But when it comes to a point where it only matters to you, it's time to let it go. It's time for when you think about it, it no longer bothers you, but it's just another thing that happened in your life.

Now, MOST importantly–look at this precious little puppy I wanted to buy at the pet store last month:

I can't wait to see my own 
puppies and dog next week!

Also, I know this is not a new song, 
but I heard it on the radio about 4 or 5 times the past two days & I re-realized how much I love it.

My oh my, you're so good-looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends
But I've not tasted all your cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking?

Do you pour a little something on the rocks?
Slide down the hallway in your socks?
When you undress, do you leave a path?
Then sink to your nose in a bubble bath?

My oh my, you're so good-looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends
But I've not tasted all your cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking?

I wanna know
I wanna know
I wanna know

Do you break things when you get mad?
Eat a box of chocolates 'cause you're feelin' bad?
Do you paint your toes 'cause you bite your nails?
Call up momma when all else fails?

Who are you when I'm not around?
When the door is locked and the shades are down?
Do you listen to your music quietly?
And when it feels just right, are you thinkin' of me?

I wanna know
I wanna know
I wanna know

My oh my, you're so good-looking
But who are you when I'm not looking?

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