Sunday, March 25, 2012

I Will

I will.
I will tell you the truth, unless the lie protects you from something much worse, and the truth can actually do no good.
I will do stupid things with you.
I will bend over backwards if you need something.
I will inconvenience myself.
I will believe in you, but I need you to believe in me.
I will trust you, but I need you to trust me too.
I will bring your favorite candy bar to you when you're having a bad day.
I will help you study or finish a project.
I will change my plans.
I will catch you when you fall, and I will carry you when you can't carry yourself, please pick me up when I fall.
I will hold you when you need it.
I will leave you alone when you need to be with yourself and your thoughts.
I will drop whatever I am doing, if at all possible, to run to your aid.
I will listen.
I will not blow you off.
I will pick you up with my car, and I will pick your spirits up.
I will give advice, or just shut up and let you talk.
I will comfort you.
I will let you be mad at me since you need to direct your anger somewhere and because the person you're really mad at isn't there.
I will get mad at you, but I will forgive you.
I will be wrong and you will be right; but sometimes I will be right and you will be wrong.
I will tell you what you want to hear, and more importantly I will tell you what you need to hear.
I will tell you're right, but I will also tell you when you are wrong.
I will be unreasonable and proud, but so will you.
I will let you cry on my shoulder, and I will need yours no matter how much I deny it.
I will sit in silence with you.
I will make you feel needed, and I will need you.
I will make mistakes; I will say stupid things. So will you. I will forgive you, I hope you forgive me.
I will tell you it's going to be okay; even when it may not, or when I can't see how it will be.
I will help you through it.
I will answer my phone at 3 a.m. and come over if you need me; and if you don't and you woke me up for no reason, I will hang up on you.
I will wait for you.
I will make you laugh.
I will never purposely hurt you.
I will always make you a priority.
I will never purposely make you feel unimportant.
I will not take "fine" at face value for the answer to the question of "How are you?"
I will never walk away.
I will always be here.
I will always care; even when I don't want to.
I will try.
I will love you.

No matter what. No matter how mad I get; no matter how long it's been; no matter how much you don't deserve it; no matter how much I don't deserve it; no matter where you are; no matter what we've said or done; no matter how much you say you don't need it. Simply, no matter what.

I do this because I love you, and I don't know how to be any other way. I do this because you are my family, and I do this because you are my friends–who I consider part of my family. I don't know how to not be this type of person. I don't know how to not care and I can't see any reason to not be this way. It's not that I am a pushover; I just like to be there. Maybe it makes me feel important, like I matter. But I can't not help when I can. It's the only way I know how to be. I don't know who I am without this; I would be lost. I do this because I can't not do this.

All I ask is that you be willing to do the same at some point.

And those who do, thank you. So much. I can't ever thank you enough.

Because I've become painfully aware of how much I do need people that I can lean on.

It often appears to be people that I don't care. I'm not one to show emotion; but I do care, and deeply so. More than you know.

1 comment:

h.v. said...

once again, why you're an awesome friend and person. beautiful words, my dear.